Saturday, December 21, 2024

We Have HOW Many Days to Christmas?

 


F'd it up again, right? Three-four days out from Cringletide and the stockings are short and the lists were long and you didn't even have enough wrapping paper to cover the spread. For one thing--Asshole! This day comes round the same date every year, pay attention next time! But also I've been there so let me  help you with the leaks in your holiday boat before you drown yourself in eggnog--again. 

Nothing is wrong with gift cards. The state mandates these hoobajoobs don't depreciate. so just admit you gave up, they are grown people and can buy their own shit and figure out a store they will actually go to.  Supermarkets are for real a good choice. People eat. Bread, eggs, carrots. Get them some of those reuseable shopping bags and wrap that up in a store circular (which is free) if you were so trash you didn't even have a reserve bag of wrapping. Amazon cards are also available at most supermarkets and drug stores, so you can do that, and buy a cute card. Job done. 


I know that feels impersonal--so try skin care. Hygiene and self-care are like a way to say "Treat yourself." Spa head band. Lotion applicator. Body brush. Microtowel. Loofa. Any drug store can help you get this beat on.

You can get hand cream gift sets from Burt's Bee's or whatever from Amazon RIGHT NOW if you are a prime customer and probably will make it, but dirty little secret? Marshall's, Ross and TJ Max have elite skincare treats for cheap right now, just snatch up a handful that fits your loved-one's profile (sweet, outdoorsy, sensitive, romantic, whev) and you can round it up in a gift bag, wrapping the things in tissue paper or create a gift basket deal, because newsflash, honey--there are baskets in dollar stores.  You can stuff a cheap dollar store basket with tissue paper and Saran Wrap and it looks wildly purposeful and just slap a bow on. Second newsflash--stock up in dollar stores because this is giftwrap Mecca, 

Sweaters--did you hit up Burlington or Ross? Frankly, if you want to get your late minute generic pullover goodness--you can always snatch up a $20-30 comfy sweater for someone there. I'm also telling you for the grown-ups on your list, there is an age where socks and slippers start to look mad attractive. 

Now, if you want to get special, last minute, elite last minute cool stuff and have a gourmand on your hands--Ross and Marshalls are great for little gourmet things. Capers, pickled peppers, spices, mustards, truffle salt, fancy pasta, various sauces like pesto and all that. Clever hand towels, little kitchen gadgets. Once again, you can grab a handful of nifty things and do a really sharp basket. Top this with a nice prosecco or a juicy Merlot and you have hit someone's sweet spot! 

If there is a young person on your list--you have to hit up their parents for clues, but Amazon gift certificates are probably always in. The kids seem to like books about recent 20th century history and why Generation Xers are so cool, so get them things about that if you can find them. (I made that up! I still think this is a good idea though!) 

Did you know that sometimes, Amazon uses brown paper as a filler to keep products from bouncing around, but you can straignten it out and use as a rustic gift wrap with twine and a gift label and it will look cool and kind of be recycling? Same for the paper they use at Ross to keep your jars from jingling together. 

I'm just saying. If you are only 3-4 days out--don't despair--prepare. Candy, nuts, dried fruit, and that sort of thing are delightful. And don't feel weird about showing up somewhere with just a panettone, a bottle of Prosecco (but don't cheap out!) and a smile. If people love you, they will appreciate the thought, 

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