Have A Zesty Generika!

Okay--I don't like doing Christmas cards. This is an issue I have--it's an obligation to mail a thing that serves little value to a person or persons who may have great social value to me, or, you know, I only have them sort of randomly in my address-book. If I really wanted to stay in touch and wish people really well and all that--I could send them an e-mail. Even attach some kind of festive clip-art. In minutes, I could design something that says "Yay, this time of year!" and "Thinking of you!" with a touch of genuine-ness.

Christmas/Holiday cards don't have this thing. I don't like them. Sometimes, they are too religion-specific for me. I don't celebrate the Baby Jesus' birthday at Christmas. I don't assume this is what other people are celebrating--so I want to keep my cards just a bit generic. I think of my December-based holiday as "Generika". The "k" means it might vaguely have something to do with culture, but otherwise, I am a very "happy holidays" kind of girl. Except for my feelings about happy....and holiday.....

See, "happy" is overused in greeting cards. Happy Valentines, Happy Halloween, Happy, Happy. Are we on uppers? Also: "Merry". Does this ever get said in real life? Have you ever said, "You know, eating pork rinds with a good chardonnay gives me a merry feeling"? Obviously, this pairing would be awesome. A crisp, sharp tang of white wine against the greasy, salty burst of porkulence? Hello? Sleigh bells in your mouth! But "merry"?

No. You don't say that. "Merry" has been subsumed into the linguistic category of "things you only say around Christmas". Christmas killed "merry". It's just a ghost haunting the word "Christmas" anymore, except in the UK, where they use "happy".

I think we need to petition for another adjective, too. Not "happy". Not "merry". I'm going with "zesty". It means piquant, lively and flavorful. I am down with the zest. And not "holidays". No. "Holi-" day is just giving in that the day has been hallowed, and I'm not about it. My card-sending has, for years, been sort of a "return-receipt" for other people sending me cards. It has basically come down to a literal message of: "I have received your Greeting Card, and return one with thanks that you provided me with your return address. We may do this again next year." So I am about "Generika". There isn't a reason for the season, I'm just performing a perfunctory courtesy demanded of me by culture and the existence of the post office, and while I'm at it, I'm going to make you accept "zestiness".

Have a Zesty Generika. Enjoy the taste of a new, more random, holiday.

I'm wishing you all a Zesty Generika. May your deepest wishes have positive outcomes in a manner more frequent than random chance alone can account for. May you also experience a pleasant terminus to the calendar year. And a very satisfactory and non-catastrophic calendar year to come!

The reason for the Season--Random Carno:

Um. Meat art is so often so wrong. And yet, I want that as the picture on my Generika cards.

Random Meat--just in time for Chanuka

Okay, it's seasonal and other blogs have posted it, so it really isn't that random--




But I can't help it.

Iron Abbey--if you are in/visiting the SE PA area.

I like to review good restaurants every now and again, just the way I review movies and books--you'll mostly get really good reviews from me, because I'm interested in pointing people to something good I've found. A place would have to be super-awful for me to give it an Internet-thrashing. So I want you to know: Iron Abbey is one of my favorite restaurants in the world. I am giving it a serious recommend.

Take my lunch experience today as part of the reason I love this place: they are a gastropub, which means the emphasis is on good food, but they have a beer list that is really comparable to Monk's Cafe in Center City (which is really damn good). So you really can't go wrong if you like some good food and some seriously great beer.

Me and the spouse started with the Mezze Platter as our appetizer, which is a generous spread of roasted peppers, prosciutto, salami, cheese, some absolutely fabulous fried green olives with blue cheese, hummus, pita, onions, water crackers, and....sheer deliciousness. The hummus was chickpea heaven. The manchego and Parmesan cheeses were good quality, as were the prosciutto and salami--this is a thing I look for in a proper anti-pasto: quality. It was a generous portion for two; my husband remarked that we really could have eaten just that and made a good lunch, and I have to say, we are both what you would call "good eaters". When a spread like this is accompanied with great beers like Fegley's Brew Works Mad Elf Reserve, which is a Holiday Ale with some really good use of "noggy" spice flavors and a heady, malty profile, or Southern Tiers' Unearthly IPA, which is a smooth, hoppy, crisp, brew of incredible drinkability for it's crazy-strong 10% ABV (that was what I was having--I am a sucker for IPA's--a total hop-head) you have a wonderful experience.

Then I had an awesome Blue Abbey burger--which won me over with conforming to some of my hard and fast burger requirements:

Good bread.

Actually cooked well-done when I said well-done.

Crispy, not chewy, bacon.

Cheese used as a flavor--not a cover (I hate when condiments smother!)

And the fries that accompanied it were flavorful and crisp, of the regular size (not steak or shoe string, but the in-between) and starch-bathed for crispness variety. They were a total "yum". I "boxed" half of the burger and most of the fries for a re-heated snack later. I also enjoyed, as my second beer, Port Brewing Company's Old Viscosity. This is a high-test Imperial Stout with strong flavor and a syrupy mouth-feel (Viscosity--indeed!) It's not a bad beer to have a dessert with--and I opted for flan. I'm a flan fan. The smooth, but rich and alcoholic flavor of the beer went really well with the caramel-custard of the flan. It was a major mouth-happy.

My spouse had the chili, which was pleasantly meaty and also quite flavorful. Because the Mad Elf was a strong beer, and he was the designated chauffeur, he declined a second beer. But I'm serious, when it comes to choosing beers at Iron Abbey--you could seriously make a day of it if you had someone else driving. There is plenty of novelty and truly tasty-sounding selections to be had if you are a beer hound--and I totally am! And even if your love of beer is just a wee thing, you will still enjoy the food: good portions, properly cooked, with great attention to the quality of ingredients. I definitely give them my seal of approval.

(And the service is always top-notch--another plus! And they are knowledgable more often than not about the beers they have, which is great if you aren't used to such a bodacious beer-menu.)

Leslie Neilsen, R.I.P. (1926-2010)

He left us so many hilarious on-screen memories. He will be missed.



I think his unique comedic gift was always that he had serious acting chops, and went about comedy in a serious way--the absurd happened around Lt. Drebben, and he took it in stride. His silliest lines were delivered dead-pan.

I kind of want to Netflix all the "Naked Gun" pictures, right now.

Anderson Cooper wears Bunny Suit for Bonobos.

This is a little funny when Cooper, who is such a serious interviewer, puts on the bunny suit to interact with the bonobos, but this piece actually is really fascinating for showing how our fellow primate near-relation does have some cognitive capacity for understanding language. This sort of thing always fascinates me because to my mind, when we think of homo forms of primate as tool-users, the thing that probably sets us the furthest apart from any other variant seems to be language.

It's impossible to know how far back this useful knack was acquired. We only vaguely know from artifacts like cave paintings when we developed an ability to express ourselves symbolically, but our vocal ability must have anteceded that by hundreds of thousands of years. Which makes me wonder if some earlier form of primate, other than homo sapiens, was the first talker.

I know for sure our less-near relation, dogs, definitely develop an impressive voabulary for spoken commands and read situations in context with surprising precision. Also, I have found that dogs and cats in homes where they are regularly spoken to, will not only sort of look like they are listening, but understand more basic things like pointing and being told to sit or go away even if they aren't inclined to do either, as if they can also "read" what is going on.

Sometimes it seems like a dog can understand "walk after dinner"--even in situations when that isn't the habitual, Pavlovian order. Do they have a sense of time? I've known dogs that have hidden treats "for later". It seems like they can strategize. My parents' current dog, Buster, seems to agonize over the decision to eat a treat or hide it under his cushion. Wheels really do seem to be turning.

For pure "squeee!"--the video has an adorable baby bonobo.

Random Meat--what is the punchline with this, anyway?

People are made of meat. We, too, are flesh. We could totally be eaten by bears. Think about that. Or sharks. You know what? Piranhas. Totally. Could be eaten by piranhas= us. That's poignant, okay?

Could we be that pig? Is that pig, us? Is it? It that pig even any Swino-Americans you've ever met?


That's just wrong. A pig, slicing itself, defies all conventions of discourse. No pig does this. We, the humans, like ham, and we kill pigs to eat it, because we are like wolves and bears and sharks: predatory mammals. Pigs don't accomodate us by self-slicing. This is just wrong and weird. It also defies physics.