David Brenner RIP

He was a stand-up legend from Philadelphia.

I think he might have been a bigger deal in the Carson era of the Tonight Show and never got that kind of Seinfeld/Cosby kind of fame, but he was awfully good. And a pretty fine example of the Philadelphia dialect as spoken. 

Celebrities for Your Consumption?

There is, obviously, a fascination with celebrity and carnivorous consumption on this humble blog, so naturally, this little site that promises to one day make literally taking a bite out of your favorite celebrities a reality has piqued my interest. There is a tongue-in-cheek quality to it that makes me suspect that this is actually a riff on our consumption of celebrity culture (seriously:

The Franco salami must be smoky, sexy, and smooth. Franco's meat will pair with lean, strong venison. Sharp Tellicherry peppercorns and caramelized onions provide Franco's underlying flavors, complemented by a charming hint of lavender. The Franco salami’s taste will be arrogant, distinctive, and completely undeniable.

 as opposed to a real dystopian cannibalism-fetish wish-fulfilment scheme--but I have been wrong about things before.

As it is, the more technical details of thing lend themselves to the suggestion of this being a hoax--like the still cost-prohibitive nature of vatted meat production on any kind of retail scale. Also, celebrities would naturally be circumpect about offering up even a trifling sample of their genetic meterial because of what might be done with it--if charcuterie itself were not outre enough. For one thing, in a world where celebrity-stalkers is a very real thing, and paparazzi and disturbing fan letters alone can give one sleepless nights, who wants to run the risk that some odd person out there develops a real taste for you and decides they would settle for nothing less than a chip off the original block, as it were?   For those who would go through with it, imagine the negotiations for licensing rights for name, image, and protection of said meat? And given what the likely final consimer price would be, naturally a demand for authentication that one was genuinely getting a Bieberburger or whatever could lead to some disputes as to the actual % of Biebermeat vs lamb or just some average mere human vatted muscle tissue. The headaches of this being a real thing abound.

So nearly plausible, but just a bit...off.

Harold Ramis, RIP

I think you probably know Egon Spengler was my favorite Ghostbuster. Basically, if I was to reference any of the really awesome comedic films that impacted my formative years and sense of humor today, well, Harold Ramis was a part of them or influenced the people that made them. That is an awesome legacy.  Ramis was an awesome talent who wasn't just funny himself, he made other people funny and made some careers. And damn funny movies. His influence was felt in subversive sarcasm and tables turning on middling bourgois status quo to suggest the status was more FUBAR. And his humor was nasty sometimes but never mean. If that makes sense. He was one of a kind.

I am Avowedly Hateful of This Olympics

Obviously, the big issue for me is the criminalization of homosexuality by the Putin government.


This is some heartbreaking stuff.

But did you know that Sochi was the site of a massacre about a hundred and fifty years ago? And that people were massively relocated to make this Olympic village happen? And that the previous residents couldn't even take their animals, so the very tame and amiable strays that are now alleged to be relocated also but are probably being killed, were pets?

I can have a giggle about the shambolic clusterfuckery  of the Potemkin-1st worldliness that is being fronted, here, but seriously, even the threat to the athletes from bad courses and accomodations is nothing compared to the human rights and animal rights abuses on display here.  Even the possibilty of terrorism is less disturbing to me.

I just can't say anything but "Screw this noise."

You know--Screw Woody Allen

I know, in my heart, I think Woody Allen is a comedic genius and has even made some good movies. But seriously, fuck him.



I get it. Woody is an intellectual and an aesthete and why are we even talking about whether he fucked his own children? I dunno. Because comedy is easy, and if anyone was ever motivated to call him out on fucking them, well, that is hard--for the victims.

I like some of his movies and well, that is how it is. But what I think about all this is--Allen's children hate him. For some reason. I am going to believe them because kissing his ass would have been 100% better for them. But they can't. And I am bound to hear out victims. And I hear them. He had his benefit of the doubt his whole life. When I read what Dylan says, I don't disbelieve her.

He isn't shit to me,  now. Even if Deconstructing Harry was awesome in my book, I dunno. I don't think he has a good answer to this.

It shouldn't be so. But I do believe it because listening to victims and believing is necessary because why else would anyone come forward?

I cannot say her story is bullshit.  And I think he has always shunned answers because he has no good ones. So, I can't even think like my admiration for anything he's done artistically is any equal to his other ethical deficits.

Today's Refrigerators Are Too Smart By Half

You know, they put computers in everything these days. Even the iceboxes:

Security researchers at Proofpoint have uncovered the very first wide-scale hack that involved television sets and at least one refrigerator. Yes, a fridge. 

This is being hailed as the first home appliance "botnet" and the first cyberattack from the Internet of Things. 

A botnet is a series of computers that seem to be ordinary computers functioning in people's homes and businesses, but are really secretly controlled by hackers. TheInternet of Things is a new term in the tech industry that refers to a concept where every device in your house gets its own computer chip, software, and connection to the Internet: your fridge, thermostat, smart water meter, door locks, etc. To a hacker, they all become computers that can be hacked and controlled.

Fine. I'll get the new MacAfee for Fridges.  What I'm holding out for, though, is a fridge that senses when there is nothing inside it and calls out for takeaway.

My Favorite Christmas Album totally has to be John Denver And the Muppets.

Miss Piggy is a great Feminist. Totes. No really. And I will also submit that Emmet Otter's Jugband Christmas is like my favorite thing ever. 

In other words, Jim Henson was like my Santa. I miss him so much.